Tired People, the Public, Fed Up With Everything

Ugh. I’m so disgusted and annoyed. And I wouldn’t even feel this way if I was already at home, relaxed, I have everything I need, peace and quiet, you know, how you be at home.

But being out here on the streets, you working on everything from, home, career and self, and in the meantime you gotta put up with all these other people out here who don’t have a clue of self and so all you feel attacked, all the time. Police, fighting, arguments, all that shit comes from low vibrational creatures and mfs out here who are lacking. Nobody who isn’t worried about if they have enough for parking are out on public transportation. So you out riding it and so these mfs be in competition with each other.

I already feel like I don’t fit in anywhere. And so since I’m sitting off by myself, you don’t see too much of that out here, outside on the streets and it’s like people want to bother that. You’ll see people just pop up out the blue and stand and lurk around you for no reason. They’ll try and come up with a stupid question, and there a bum, some blue pill smoking ass addict, tryna ask you for a cigarette.

I’m so tired of bums it’s like, they make me angry because, I’m sleeping at the bus stop and hear mfs the only ones walking around in the middle of th night. So my own issue is finances. So that being my only thing, I don’t give a fuck about who else is suffering out here on the streets because because he Freddy for other peoples energies. And these same ones that be out smoking and everybody feeling sorry for be the main ones causing stress and chaos and bullshit because they don’t know how to handle themselves. Just yesterday some stupid mexican bitch pushed a security guard into me after he asked me to leave cause this hit was yelling at ME talking about oh she defending Mexico. Now when she like oh let’s meet outside and I met her and this bitch still standing there talking shit, I could have been someone to really stick it to her. So now I gotta go to court next week to defend myself, like bitch you can’t get mad because you mad about what somebody saying about mexican. FUCK A GOTDAMN MEXCIAN.

They be out here talking shit tryna hurt people with words all the time, now all of sudden these wet back fuckers wanna get offensive? They don’t own this fucking country. They not the only ones who work or own businesses. They not the one true race, don’t nobody care about being no fucking mexicain , don’t nobody give a fuck about Mexico.

I’m saying that because I’m over on the west coast, Arizona. And so it’s mostly like interracial shit if you do see black peoples fucking with them. And it’s like they be tryna seem nice to seem like a a savior or nice group of people, when really they want to snag a black person to enslave them mentally and want all the others to see them.

These mfs don’t be NOBODY. Do you know how many people wish they were famous or could get noticed on Hollywood blvd? So nobody has time to entertain bums off the street. So the solution is to not be out here with them. They don’t have no fucking money, only bums come to the library, so you know it’s only bullshit here. And all the other places where broke, bum, basic mfs come to. Tired of being crowded by bums and they too fucking needy. Want somebody to look at them too bad. Don’t be having shit going on. At least in L.A. you got a couple dudes tryna sell knicks and knacks on the train, out here in Phoenix these mfs ain’t doing shit but smoking fucking pills. That shit stinks and it’s fucking ugly. So all it is is you surrounded by zombies unless you have a car. And these mfs got these lil part times, and ssi, and they tryna fill up the positions with just mexicans, so it’s nothing but bullshit all around.

It’s just annoying and then you be like fuck people because all they tryna do is make you feel low so it’s like, bitch you not my race, well fuck, you, fuck you. And so it’s like you got to beat them another way. They no smarter than nobody else. It ain’t nothing but negative energy out here and so it’s like, whatever whisper energy they on, and all that oh everybody supposed to know some secret code, and every head nodding and shit, bitch I’m not listening to no voices in nobody else head. That’s not my issue. And all they be doing is tryna spread they misery. How you gon be out here smoking heroin for 25 years then think yo logic putting up with somebody that’s not doing that. Then kids be tryna play smart but it’s like ok, you tryna read adult body movements, why you ain’t no child prodigy? Fuck that.

They sitting up here tryna act like witches and wizards and don’t have shit. Why feel like everybody talking about you? These mfs can’t fuck with you if you not around that shit they try to dish out. They can only try to be in competition with each other. They can’t get to no higher level. So me not fitting in out here, they like tryna target me because I seem like fresh pure meat. I’m not tryna be seen by them, I don’t need their validation or opinion and that’s what they be expecting. Then they see, oh you a tough black cookie, they wanna try to disarm you and play nice. Whole time you see the demon in they’re face. And I’m just tired of playing thee games. That’s why I don’t talk to nobody out here. And yet and still be running into issues with these fucking bums.

Bitch obviously yo ass ain’t get you no ride or got no rich dude pulling over to pick you up or order you no Uber to take you where you going. So don’t be tryna stand at the crosswalk tryna seem more seen than me cause you you still walking. And that’s all they be doing. They can’t reason logic because they’re stupid.


The Streets Make You Mad – Current Situation | Anxiety, Depression, No Therapy



I’m so tired of beig out here like this. After five years of being homeless like at this point I’m truly over bei around people. I’m tired of being at bus stops upon waking up. Being. At shelters, jails, mental hospitals. All of that annoying shit. And then realizing there’s really not shit out here and even with all of these distractions and nuisances around I still have to keep a positive attitude Even doing that not wanting some evil, high, mentally ill scrambler walking down the street or on the train trying to come around and steal good energy.

People be sitting up here talking to me for no reason l. Don’t be bothering nobody, and a bum would come over just to see if I respond, just to be seen, or whatever it is, they’re not regular people. First of all no ones just going to trust some bum walking down the street and assume just because they’re homeless and smoke fetnyal they’re harmless. You’d think if you say a simple no they’d go away but even with that, I’m not sitting up here at 4 and 5 am to talk to no fucking bum. It’s so freaking N annoying!

These people out here be having bad energy, bad attitudes l, all these people out here looking for validation, wanna be seen, and really nobody’s at a position where that’s the example to follow. These mfs on the trains and buses don’t have anything. I barely see anyone ever reading or doing anything productive, so it’s really no inspiration. Pretty much anywhere along this whole train route bums are. And it’s like the people that work at the gas stations are more comfortable with people like the bums and addicts than someone who is obviously not like them.

I have meat on my bones. I’m weari my shades. It’s hot as the middle of hell out here in Phoenix, so I’m having on these clothes, long sleeves and caps and head coverings, which probably gets me more stared at because it’s not a lot of people my skin color out here that’s out on the streets that’s not on drugs and not tryi mg to just fit in with everyone else. Cause these mexicans out here think they superior to opposites and they are hateful and have bad vibes. They think they’re people is supposed to be automatically liked or looked at, and these females really be trash and dumb. I see it like bitch you workin go at the gas station or some temp place or whatever whatever you doing is not better just because it’s a lot of mexicans out here. They be tryna subtlety make it seem like if a mexican bitch a bum an obvious prostitute or drug addict is supposed to get a pass for not being shit just because h the e bitch that race. They not the only ones to have businesses or who work. Then they out here making it seem like if a black person latches on to them they some savior but it’s to look like oh I have this black person on a leash everybody look. And both of their asses sittting out here homeless as fuck.

I can’t stand no mf that smoke cigarettes. I hate drug addicts and bums. There’s no sympathy from me about no bum cause guess what these be he main people out here causing trouble. It’s certain places they won’t walk into or go because they know they don’t fit in there. Just because they got on a dress today riding the train, bitch you not cute, you not sexy, everybody sits on these damn seats, they’re not sanitized, ain’t nobody out here tryna save no bus fare just to park at some park and ride, nobody’s gonna assume you’re not homeless or have a car, no it’s just some bum bitch on the train. And this is the only spot where they can ‘show’ off for the next person and nobody’s on these fucking trains or buses but broke bum mfs!

I’m like if these mfs not buying what I’m selling ain’t no need for me to really talk to them cause somewhere along that, it’s a waste of time, they ain’t going nowhere, they got narcissistic tendencies, they don’t have no conversation, they too hung up on who sees them out on the street, like they be talking and whispering to the next stranger. I dont give a fuck about no gang stalking shit, I’m the only one in my own thoughts, my own mind. And ain’t nobody else finna sit up here and be born tryna make it seem like I haven’t. Then all they doing out here is tryna see me. And I hate it. Cause I’m not getting good vibes back, it doesn’t feel useful to me to sit up here just cause somebody walking down the street to give them some acknowledgement, cause that’s the common thing of how commoners do out here. I’m not no regular schmegular out here. That’s why I can’t do temp jobs, even the dispatchers be jealous of me trying not to send me out on assignments after I been up there since 4 am. Shit like that.

People really be jealous of me out here. And I think I physically see the matrix right in front of me. Like it’s not even funny. I can’t do no shelters, as wide open as it is out here, like it’s not meant to live out on the streets l, anywhere you go is a space for somebody to try to fuck with you if you not at home or have something to back you up. Don’t go to know cheap ass circle k cause only bums and broke people go there. Ain’t nobody reading or even talking about shit on the trains but they fucking problems and issues, and what license or if they tryna get,. It’s so irritating. Then if they see you don’t have on headphones, plus you’re not looking at them or up when someone gets on the train, here goes the conversations tryna say something to be heard, all this old stupid kindergarten shit and it’s like I could be at the flea or market or some shit meeti mg better people. I highly fucking doubt if these neighborhoods around here making eight million a week off drugs. These bums out here on the street don’t have shit. Police ain’t doing shit, all the trouble is fucking fetnyal addicts and so they treat everybody like that, they soft and weak out here in Arizona and they don’t expect nobody to retaliate or combat them. They got that same systematic approach to either try and fuck with you to see if you gon get loud, even if you just sitting there not doing nothing, it’s so many other people in the library , why this mf only over here talking about am I ok? Like, I don’t have to respond to anybody. Actually it’s best not to say anything to them cause they like arguing anyway. As stupid as they are.

It’s so annoying that I’m not even interested in the next person. Some mf carrying a fucking book bag or bag, what use is that for me?

That’s why I’m not at the shelter. It’s not healthy to be around that type of energy for too long. You there for a voucher, somewhere to stay and save your money, if it was just that, it’s doable, you can deal, I put up with it for a month, another place 3 maybe two, but realize you out here with all these people and they got all this bad energy on them, they ain’t used to nothing but sitting up not not doing anything everyday so they don’t mind looking and watching you, they don’t mind tryna make trouble for you, the bum bitches wanna feel feminine knowing that they not in the state where they’re desired, some other addict fucking on them, that’s it, then they wanna try and stand in front of me or on the other side at the desk, when it’s rude to do that when a person up here talking about tryna get a bed, bitch you have no respect, you do not know how to conduct yourself. These mfs a come up on you and touch you for no reason. Where do they do that and somebody doesn’t get shot? Like nobody said anything to them or even looked at them? What, that’s supposed to be ok just because this bitch is obviously a crack head. That’s what makes it even fucking worse! I don’t want no ducking bum touching me. But if I wild the fuck out then it’s gon have to be some explaining to do. And they like drama. It’s this light this glow about me, like I shouldn’t be around no bums at all. And when I say I dislike em and I don’t have any sympathy for them, understand I been out here homeless for five years.

And I’m extreme not tired of sharing space with other people. It causes so much unnecessary distress. And then it makes it seem so fucking small when it’s all this fucking space, then out here walking, here got all these eyes, then it seem like all these ppl just bunched up in the same spaces. Same sidewalk, same way, then they tryna act big out here like ain’t nobody feeling like ‘no, bitch you get the fuck out of MY way!’ It’s so annoying. Go up to the damn self check out thing at the library, somebody’s there. Wasn’t nobody there on my way to the restroom. How ironic is that. Then it’s like ok just cause you look at this person doesn’t mean they probably aren’t a mass shooter, but you looking up or in this persons face, who has sunglasses head covering and long clothing on, that doesn’t make you tough!

I can’t stand the simple minded behavior out here. You’re not going to see any millionaires camping out at no damn library, they can buy anything here! Only ppl that need wifi or a library card is a broke mf that really is caught up in this matrix dude. It’s so annoying.


And then just last night/ this 1am morning some homeless, white, high dude came to the bus stop I was sleeping at at actually moved my legs to try and sit down and clear I was sleeping on the bench with my hands in my shirt and face covered. Then when I called 911 he played victim and said I hit him. Luckily the Lord was on my side, and I didn’t have any warrants because I really didn’t have to give them my ID, this dude didn’t even have a phone and was obviously a transient and I’m just tired of people like that. And out here in Arizona that seems to be how all these ppl are out here and it’s being tired of being in the same places and then all you running into all day is people trying to get your attention because you don’t look like the others and it’s like I don’t get anything from that.

And it’s this constant energy like ppl tryna get you to seem them, hope you see them so they can show you they don’t like you. They out here thinking you supposed to have an attitude and wanna be their friends just so they can try and make you feel low. Like I’m so tired of people. These type of people. They don’t have shit to offer. Mehta would a rich person or anybody who has anything going for tnhemaelves need to come to the library l? So you know the type of people that are there? Homeless, troublemaking, imbalanced, jealous, hateful, oh look at me instead, (nobody cares you exist), bums.

<Super sigh of exasperation>